Back in Full Speed....

New Years Day Hike!

I am finally feeling like LM is fully back to full speed... I now have an even greater respect for families who go through serious medical stuff -- we just had some "basics" done, and it was literally a month that, in many ways we moved forward, but in many ways we moved back...and, let us not forget he turned 2 during "the blur" and yes, no worries, he did get "I am 2: The Memo" even tho he was not feeling 100%. And that memo, as all you reading parents know, FEELs like 10 steps back because everything requires more negotiation, more cautious transition approaches, more attunement than we already had to respect our child while still help our child understand we are their parents.... I do have to say a major 10 steps forward in emotion sharing - LM is not only seeking hugs and cuddles, he'll stay there for them for long long periods of time. This was definitely not the case prior to the surgical procedures & hospital stay!
I find it astounding and hilarious (and, ok, a wee bit frustrating at times!) that this child, who was barely hearing 6 weeks ago, and doing his best to imitate words, has found his first full sentence which is fully audible to any audience is, "I do it myself". And nothing like a control freak little kid trying to out-choice, out-decision, out-attitude his control freak mom. It's been an interesting and fun time. While I am serious about this skill, however, and while sometimes I find myself taking a deep breath (ok, and even walk away but still within sight) so I don't have a knee jerk response -- holy cow - it is really hard. Why is it that the things they chose to exert control over with verbal and physical manner are always the most unsafe or socially inappropriate boundary testing activities?? Pull the plug on the tub and replace it 10 times before it drains? Sure, why not, we have no place to go and it will just keep you in the warm, water to help you start revving down to sleep... But, No, LM, I don't care how much fun you think it will be, scaling the wall above the houses, at our driveway level, at our neighbor's house which does not have a fence is just not OK... And then other times, things that you are like "Please, will you just start taking control of X (fill in things like "potty training, feeding yourself, entertaining yourself while I go to the potty without you standing there and hugging my legs, etc etc etc..)
It is funny the things about parenting we are learning... and loving... He really is a great kid!

Exploring His Feminine or Future Jockey Side

"It's 5 O'Clock Somewhere" 31 Weeks and Look,
A Reindeer left it's antlers behind!

Swimming with my Cuzin's!

And, let us not forget, while we all find things to do inside while it is FREEZING out here, there is Ashton... who is having a REALLY tough winter. Poor guy. His control and energy seeking ways are really challenging to deal with....

AHHHH.... Sun...
I know, I feel bad for the old guy... First a toddler in to shake up his space and attention and stepping down the totem pole, and now he is subjected to this this winter.... poor puppy... need to see a close up to the challenges of his life?....

AHH Sun Part Duex

Meanwhile, on the Little Man front, we are working on self feeding... Yes, I am an OT.. and Yes, much against usual OT theory, we took away all self care skills... Yup, we did take the approach to regressing him -- we sat him on our laps the first month home and had him face us, and we fed him... and he learned to chew, and he learned to eat a variety of foods, and he learned to make eye contact, and he learned to trust.... And now that he's feeling better, he's 2, but back to eating anything we put in front of him. Non-negotiable. Volumes vary, as they do with all toddlers, but whether it be eggplant or quesadilla with turkey, or tonight's dish of salmon/cous cous/ brocolli, he eats it... When we feed it to him... LOL. Ah, yes -- so now we are working on progression of self feeding... my friend, Joan, and OT also, laughs at some of our approaches -- I've been known to pull out cheese knives with cool handles he'll want to hold to look at (did you know that you can scoop pretty good with those?), toothpicks to have a meal of mangos, apples, and cheese, and that you can come up with all sorts of elaborate ways to make a plate fun that do not include buying plates which have Dora, etc on them (sorry LM, we are saving for your sibling and you can eat off our plates... although someone gave us a plate with Handy Manny or some sort of character and he LOVEs that one. Of course he spends most of his time shoving food around in it just to uncover Handy Manny, not necessarily eat it...LOL)... And you know what? While I am sure a lot of people are thinking "Well, just tell him he has to eat it".. and yes, ultimately I am sure that would work. But, the thing is, I want him to approach meals with excitement and fun, and with my background in feeding, I worry if I push him too much, I'll get too intense for what he needs...we also find that some of our "antics" to get him to eat also promote social exchanges and skills that will help him later on... We'll see how it goes, but so far I truly believe the benefits of regressing a 17 month old who was self feeding everything down to soup and porridge with adult sized spoons far outweigh the cons....For our family... I know this is not the right choice for all families, or for all children... but this little boy needed a lot of help knowing he was connected to us -- he was just old enough to "be his own man" but not quite old enough to understand how things are connected. Seriously, it's amazing the difference in adoption that a few months in either direction can make.... Of course, this is all not to say that we aren't sometimes saying, "LM, do you really NOT remember 7 months ago, or is it just more fun to pretend you don't remember?".... :)














...Hey, it's the "Reindeer Arches"..... .......Yummo.....

It's been a really cold winter. Well, who am I kidding? It is probably no colder than it's been the last 5 years, I am just finally not locked into some sort of working situation where I never see daylight in the winter, and so actually now take notice.... which means my old joints are also taking notice... and LM is finding all sorts of creative ways to stay warm... And, so, "Big Whitie" -- we bought "Big Whitie" 12 years ago, in a store in Palo Alto. People thought Jeff was crazy "Why do you need that coat here?"... Let me tell you how often we fight over who gets to wear that coat walking the dog together, etc... And, of course, LM can't be left out of the "Big Whitie" action....

"It's 5 O'Clock Somewhere" Home 32 Weeks
& Papa's "Big Whitie" is Awesome!